Medication Vs. Counseling

There is seldom a day that goes past where I don't have a client who
comes to me with a great concern that their medications are not working.
Often, when I ask what they are doing for themselves, they develop a
rather puzzled look on their face. Most of the time, they say that they
just wait for the medication to take effect.

More and more, society is putting focus on medications while ignoring
personal responsibility. It is very easy to blame a chemical imbalance
in the brain when one becomes angry and harms someone, or when a person
does not have enough motivation to get a job or leave the house. When
people have these problems, an overwhelming number of them focus on the
perceived need for medications and then are displeased to find that
these medications often do not fix the problem. Really, I can't blame a
person for feeling that they should take a medication when they have
such a problem. We have a society that has a huge focus on medications
and there are frequent prescription drug commercials on TV.

I want everyone to realize that there is a need for medication in many
cases. The current prescription medications are helpful for many people
and lets them function. I think it is important to point out that
people who take meds also need to take care of their mental health by
looking at their thinking, how they interact with others, and their
level of physical activity.

If people continue to place themselves in stressful environments,
isolate themselves, have a lot of negative thinking, and get little
exercise, they will likely have minimal benefit from a medication only
approach. How can one attain significant changes if they do not change
their thinking and behaviors?

What does counseling have to offer that medication does not? Well,
medication helps to decrease symptoms so that a person can function.
Counseling helps a person identify the causes of these symptoms. Often,
these causes are a result of some sort of a relationship problem.
Sometimes feelings of depression and anger are stemming from ourselves
because we concentrate on negative things and continue to be ourselves
up. How can a person feel good if there is continued negative self talk
and continued relationship problems which cause very stressful
environments?

I want everyone to realize that there are chemical and behavioral
(thinking and doing) sides to our problems. Not everyone needs
medications. Many people can manage their emotions by participating in
therapy and changing their thinking and behaviors.

I urge everyone to first give therapy a try. If that doesn't work, or
has little success, then there may be a need for medication in addition
to therapy.

What to Expect from Counseling

Many people are afraid to come to a counseling session because they find
it too intimidating. I can't blame them. Heck, I find it difficult to
go to the doctor when I am feeling sick and can't go to work. So, it is
a new experience and often provokes some natural anxiety. Your first
session is the hardest and it gets easier from there!

Here are some of the questions I've been asked:

* Am I any less of a man for coming to counseling?
No. If counseling weren't manly, I wouldn't be doing it! I'll tell you
that its much more manly to deal with your problems, compared to being
too proud and trying to handle everything yourself. This way of
thinking usually makes things a lot worse.

* Are you trying to find a mental illness?
No, I'm not. I want to talk with you in order to gain an understanding
of both the problems you want to work on, where those problems are
coming from, and what is going RIGHT in on your life. Yes, its
important to talk about the successes in your life and not just dwell on
the negatives.

* Will you want to spend all the time discussing my childhood.
No, I want to help you work on what you came here to address. I find it
to usually be a waste of time to have an emphasis on the past. It is
over and done with. There may be times that it needs to be understood,
but having a primary focus on the past is often frustrating on the
client and does little good. Lets focus on the here and now, which will
likely help you feel better quickly!

* Do I have to be mentally ill in order to go to Counseling?
What? No. Counseling is to help people work though problems. If you
had to be mentally ill to have a problem, then we'd all be crazy as
loons. There is no shame in seeking an outsider's view on a problem you
have. Actually, its a sign of good mental hygiene!

* How long will this take? Will I be in therapy for years?
Most people finish up their counseling sessions within 10 sessions or
less. This is because we focus on the here and now. I also give
homework assignments, so people can get more value out of their
counseling. That is, they are able to work on their counseling when
they are outside my office. This means that you will obtain quicker
results and have less money invested. If you happen to take more than
10 sessions, don't worry about it. It goes back to how everybody is
different and not everyone moves at the same pace.

* Are you a mind-reader?
No. I wish I was! You'll have to tell me why you are coming in and a
little bit about yourself. :)

* Is this confidential?
Yes. What we discuss does not go beyond you and I, unless you give
written permission for me to disclose information about your sessions,
such as if you are referred by probation, a lawyer, and so on. The only
time I can tell anyone your business is if you are going to kill
yourself, you are going to hurt someone, there is child abuse, or a
judge orders me to disclose your information.

* Is this anonymous?
No. Others may see you walk into my office. So, you could be seen. No
one would know your business, though. If you feel that you could not
risk being see at my office, some coaching via telephone or email is an
option. That is pretty anonymous.

*What types of counseling do you do?
I specialize in anger management, anxiety, and sexuality of various
types (such as transgender, sexual orientation, sexual dysfunction,
sexual harassment, sexual addiction, and sexual questions in general).
However, I also work with depression, bipolar disorder and a variety of
issues. I do individual, group, family, and couples counseling.

*Do I need medication?
Counseling is the primary focus. A high number of people get better by
therapy alone. Changing your thinking and your behavior usually is
enough for people to return to functional lives. However, if therapy is
not working, then we will discuss referring you to have a medication
evaluation. Medication alone often masks symptoms and does not get at
the root of the problem.

*Will you fix me?
No, I will not. However, I will help you fix yourself. I can give you
ideas, you can bounce things off me, we can work together to find
solutions. However, I cannot make things better for you. Remember, you
are the one who needs to do the hard work and I can help.

*What is your primary focus on therapy?
I want to talk about what is on your mind. You are the one that guides
the conversation. I can provide some information and direction and
information, if needed. However, I really want you to be the one who is
running the show.

Do you have any additional questions that I have not answered? Leave a
comment and I'll respond.

Is counseling or therapy right for me?

Counseling or Therapy (Depending on what you like to call it) is about
working though life's problems. You might be thinking that you can
handle all of these problems yourself. Well, most of us need someone to
bounce ideas off of. This is even more helpful when that person is
someone who is impartial, outside of the situation, and does not have an
emotional investment in you. If you rely on friends, they will likely
not tell you how it is because of fear that they will offend you!

So, you might be wondering if you have to be mentally ill in order to go
to counseling. Not at all. Most of the people who come to see me are
not mentally ill. Rather, the people who come to counseling are those
who feel like they need some guidance, consultation, or education on a
particular subject (often something related to how to manage teenagers,
anger, anxiety or sexuality).

If you are still wondering if counseling is right for you, feel free to call
(765-446-9898) or email me to discuss things further.